Putting the egg before the chicken

When MARK PARTON buys eggs, he only thinks about breakfast, not about the well being of the chooks

SOMETIMES I think about buying free-range eggs – and then I just buy the cage eggs. Why?

Well, because they’re cheaper. I’m clearly not the only heartless bastard out there buying cage eggs either. The supermarkets are still doing a roaring trade in eggs of the evil variety.

I had a fascinating discussion about this with the Greens spokesperson for feathered creatures Caroline Le Couteur.

She generously indicated that she didn’t think any less of me for my insensitive views and conceded that I’m not alone.

I understand that chickens are living creatures and that they have feeling, but so do blowflies and cockroaches and it doesn’t stop us from coming up with dastardly ways to painfully end their lives.

Caroline and the Greens can’t stop worrying about the chooks. Again, they’ve been talking about phasing out battery cage-egg production in the ACT, which seems to me to have very little point.

Unless you ban the sale of cage eggs in Canberra then people will just buy the googs which have been trucked in from over the border. So the only two results would be our chicken farm closing down and Greens voters getting a warm and fuzzy feeling because they believe that we’ve made the world a better place.

God help us if the Greens do have a win on the egg-farm issue, because then they may move on to legislate against fly spray and cockroach bombs.

Mark Parton is the breakfast announcer on 2CC

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