“THERE’S nobody I dislike so much that I’d recommend this film to them!” (J Ellis, Lt. Col, ret’d)

My friend’s summation says it all. Any allocation of stars would have to enter negative territory!

When Kath and Kim were on TV, you knew they would get back in their box after half an hour. On the big screen, they exhaust their welcome sooner than that. Jane Turner and Gina Riley have written a flabby plot nearly three times that length, packed with derivative clichés, cruel humour and rhyming doggerel, as the foxy ladies from Fountain Lakes and their friend Sharon (Magda Szubanski, always worth watching) win a trip to the kingdom of Papiloma.

If Kath and Kim are your thing, go for it. The problem is less their film’s cringe-making caricatures of the ugly Aussie in foreign lands than its presumption that anybody in any country might want to waste time watching them.

At all cinemas