THE term “sex addict” is likely to bring on muffled laughter, thoughts of golf star Tiger Woods or a “you’d be lucky to have it” attitude.

But according to a Canberra sex addiction therapist, it’s a huge global problem that can be more addictive than cocaine and seriously damage lives.

Director of sex addiction therapy service The Oak Centre, John Larkin, has counselled hundreds of sex addicts from his Belconnen office or via Skype for the past six years.

His clients – a mix of men and women – are from all over the world, including the US, France, Uganda and Kazakhstan.

“At the moment, I am the only certified sex addiction therapist in Australia, so there’s not a lot of help out there,” Mr Larkin says.

“This has become a big global problem and it’s very misunderstood. It can ruin careers, destroy relationships, lead to crime – it’s just huge.”

Mr Larkin estimates more than one million Australians are struggling with sex addiction, and is pushing for it to be recognised as a mental illness as an ever-growing number of potential clients self-diagnose.

“People can accept if someone is addicted to alcohol, drugs, or food, but somehow they can’t understand the notion that people can be addicted to sex – and it can be an extremely damaging, difficult thing,” he says.

“I’ve had cocaine addicts who are also sex addicts come to me and say sex is the more addictive drug.”

But how do you define sex addiction? Mr Larkin says it is like any other addiction where something begins to control your life and relationships or work suffer as a result.

“The bottom line is people with sex addiction are unable to stop or reduce certain behaviours which have negative consequences,” he says.

“This can range from damaged family relationships, cheating, dependence on prostitutes, viewing pornography at work… it’s not about the behaviour itself, it’s about the inability to stop, when their life is out of control.”

Some clients will submit themselves for treatment but usually the sex addict’s partner will call on behalf of their loved one, says Mr Larkin.

“They’ll call up after it’s hit the fan, so to speak, when they’ve found them out or their employer has seen their internet history and said: ‘What can we do?’ The partners are also traumatised and want to save their relationship,” he says.

One of Mr Larkin’s clients, Angela*, is a Melbourne businesswoman who discovered her partner had been “heavily into” porn, internet chatting and cybersex.

“He’d be driven by the hunt to find someone to satisfy this need, with the underlying need to be loved, and as soon as this need was satisfied there’d be a level of despair and loneliness,” she says.

Angela says she and her partner have been seeing Mr Larkin for a year and have had “some amazing turnarounds.”

“He’s no longer chatting to girls, no cybersex, he’s gone from being a liar and cheater to being honest with me, but we’re still working on it,” she says.

To “treat” sex addicts, an extensive counselling process is involved where Mr Larkin looks at his clients’ behaviour and background.

He says many of his clients have had childhood development problems ranging from physical abuse, emotional deprivation and emotional abandonment, picking up sex as a “soothing thing” that alters the mood.

“To treat these people, a core process is treating their background and trauma, and after that it’s about boundary setting,” Mr Larkin says.

It could be putting a filter on the internet, or a password, or not walking past sex shops, avoiding these triggers. We come up with ways to manage emotions that are healthy; things like joining a gym, reading books, music, seeing friends. At the end of it, we want that person to go back to having a healthy sex life.”

And while full recovery can take up to five years, Mr Larkin says he has had “countless” success stories.

“I’ve had people come to me and thank me for helping them get their life back,” he says.

“Seeing these people heal, and go back to having a healthy relationship, that’s the best part of my job… it’s why I chose to do this.”

For more information visit sexaddictionhelp.com.au

*Name has been changed