I USED to consider privacy was a basic human right, something essential and non-negotiable. That was before I became a parent.

Before children, going home and shutting the door at the end of the day meant peace, quiet and privacy. My husband and I could go off to our various spots to take time out and de-stress, something that seemed vital in our busy working lives. But all that came to an abrupt end with parenthood.

As a very anxious first-time mum, I never stopped worrying about our baby boy and couldn’t leave him alone for a minute. One consequence, among many, was the end of extended, relaxing showers.

Worried I wouldn’t hear his cries above the sound of the shower, I got into the habit of putting him into the pram and wheeling him into the bathroom.

By the time our daughter was born, some three and a bit years later, I was less anxious and quite happy to have a few minutes of peace under the calming stream of the shower. However, by that time, my very sociable three-year-old boy was mobile, hated to be on his own for any length of time, had no concept of privacy and a compulsion to open shut doors or bang on them until someone else did!

In the years that have followed privacy and personal space are concepts long forgotten with two happy, curious and very talkative children shadowing our every step around the house.

It’s a rare moment when one is alone. Even sitting on the loo brings no respite. Indeed, both children have long seen what should be a final refuge as a place where they can get my undivided attention (be it through a closed door now) as they tell me what they did at school or whatever else is in their minds, sing me songs, recite haiku or get me to help them with their homework.

Only late at night, when the kids are asleep, is there any true peace or real privacy. That’s the time for adult conversations and late-night viewing that can move to something other than the Disney Channel. Sadly, by then my husband and I are usually too tired to really enjoy those moments and usually just head off to bed.

For a while I’ve wondered if I need to draw a clear line in the sand to teach the kids about the importance of respecting other people’s space, especially mine!

However, recently I have noticed a slight turning of the tide. My son, now a rapidly growing tween, has suddenly discovered his own need for privacy. He locks the door to the bathroom and spends an inordinately long time in there much to the chagrin of his eight-year-old sister. He bans uninvited guests from his bedroom, puts up “do not enter” signs and asks people to respect his personal space, give him some “alone time” and “not disturb his calm”. I have assured him I get that, I really do…