Welsh / Capital ‘shaken to the core’ as Academy closes, not!

THE closure of a Civic entertainment institution has caught the eye of Australia’s fake news site “The Betoota Advocate”. The site, which promotes itself as “Australia’s oldest newspaper”, responded to the demise – after 15 years – of the Academy Nightclub, with a banner headline: “Turnbull declares a month of mourning in response to Academy closing”.

Mike Welsh

Mike Welsh.

“The Advocate” revealed that the PM called a special press conference to address the news, which he claimed had “no doubt shaken the capital to its core”.

Turnbull added: “There isn’t one politician here who can honestly say they haven’t been through those doors or peeled their feet off the floor of what is, or rather was, the greatest nightclub in Australia.”

ON New Year’s Day, 1992, four Canberra siblings took an aircraft flight they’ll probably never forget. The story was retold this week after the death of former US First Lady Barbara Bush. President George Bush and Mrs Bush were visiting Sydney and, following a function at Kirribilli House, were required to fly to Canberra to address the Federal parliament. The Bushes kindly invited the children of then PM Paul KeatingKatherine, Alexandra, Caroline and Patrick – to join them on Air Force One for the flight to Canberra.

BOUNCERS may soon be needed at the Tuggeranong dog park after a scathing post on social media forced the site’s moderator to close the comments option. The Facebook post, which attracted more than 320 contributions, many threatening and vitriolic, alleged bullying and intimidation by regular users.

“Dog owners in Tuggeranong, especially at the dog park between 9 and 10, hang your heads in the shameful act [sic] you were involved in… my neighbour came home in tears saying because of one person that thought her dog was savage you all ganged up and kicked her out!”

Hairdresser Marisa Farrell’s much-abused sandwich board. Photo by Mike Welsh

STILL on doggy dos and don’ts; a north Canberra hairdresser, frustrated that her advertising board was being used as a toilet by local canines, took drastic action. Lyneham Hair Fashions attached a note to the sandwich board requesting humans TO point their pets’ private parts in another direction. Owner Marisa Farrell says since the area became more dog friendly people tether their pets to the sign and she is forced to deal with what they invariably leave behind.

THE universal and dependable icebreaker in social situations is to talk about the weather. Social chatter in Canberra at this time of year is often centred around the unwritten but immutable law which forbids the firing up (regardless of fuel source) of any form of domestic heating until Anzac Day. But as the deadline approached some locals have confessed to a more cavalier approach and have been “enjoying our fires for weeks.”

THE reality of keeping warm during a Canberra winter is a far greater priority for some in our city than adhering to a rigid ritual based around April 25. A high percentage of renters in the capital are being forced to “camp out”. According to a new report published by Better Renting, four out of 10 rental properties have zero energy efficiency ratings (EER). Better Renting director Joel Dignam says renters are “being left to suffer in the worst properties on the market”. He says almost half of renters are living in “glorified tents that do virtually nothing to keep inhabitants safe and comfortable.”

IS the local food industry being impacted by the contemporary craze of Netflix and home-delivered food? That’s the opinion of one local expert following the abrupt closure of Jamie’s in Civic. The restaurant – which has struggled since opening in late 2013 – closed without notice on April 16 leaving 40 stranded. The closure, according to the foodie insider may be due, in part, to basic economics and a lack of motivation. Flopping on the couch, turning on Netflix and ordering in is apparently “less than a quarter of the effort”.

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