WRITER Pollyanna Darling lives in far-off Mullumbimby, NSW, and has her time cut out looking after four noisy boys, but she’ll be at Smiths Alternative Bookshop next week for a book launch.

Darling is the author of “The Relationship Revelation”, a book she says that arose out of the life-coaching experiences that taught her what works and what doesn’t work when it comes to relationships.

A strong believer that “it’s all you”, a version of “it’s all about me”, Darling says it’s a mistake to focus on the other person and that life’s little problems – and bigger ones – can be resolved by resisting the temptation to focus on other people and turn attention to ourselves.

In her view, we spend so much time being nice to people around us, that we forget to “validate” ourselves.

She goes further. “Your enjoyment of your relationship is directly related to how much time you spend focused on your partner. Less is good,” she says.

Armed with a graduate diploma in Business Administration and an interest in IT, marketing, business development and (obviously) child-bearing, Darling embarked on life-coaching several years ago.

“There’s something truly magical about connecting a person to their innate wisdom and watching them create a life that makes their heart sing,” she says.

Adamant that what she is teaching “is not new agey”, she aims to gives her readers tools to shift out of old patterns and limiting beliefs and into achieving their dreams.

And no, she doesn’t believe that what she’s teaching will create individuals too independent to have a relationship. On the contrary, she says, it is possible to transform a tired old relationship into “a sizzling, passionate, loving union”.

Pollyanna Darling’s book launch, free mini-workshop, Q and A, and signing will be held at Smiths Alternative Book Shop, noon-2pm, Saturday, December 10.