THOUSANDS of dedicated parents get up early on frosty, winter Saturday mornings and dutifully drive their kids to their chosen sporting venue – rain, hail or, hopefully, shine.

We do it because sport is unquestionably good for our kids. There are, of course, the obvious benefits of sport such as healthy bodies, strength, stamina and skills that should be of benefit through much of our kids’ lives.

There are also other benefits such as friendships, teamship, dedication and resilience. If you get it right, kids’ sport is a win-win in every sense. That’s certainly been our experience with two enthusiastic, sporty kids.

But what happens when all the hard work and training doesn’t pay off and those great dreams of standing on that podium just aren’t realised this time?

There may be tears. There may be tantrums. So-called team mates can let fly with all sorts of recriminations. Parents lost in the moment can behave pretty badly.

In our case, both our kids have been doing the same sport for a while now – first acrobatics and then figure skating.

When they started they often competed against each other. Nothing disturbs family calm like one child getting a trophy when the other doesn’t even place.

For a parent it’s a difficult one because you want to celebrate with the one that won while at the same time commiserating with the one that didn’t. You want to be as proud as punch and still not say anything that will show favourites.

Both our kids have at various times beaten their sibling; neither takes it well. For the uber-competitive nine-year-old it’s a terrible blow. For her less competitive, but soon to be a teenager brother, losing to his little sister has been a serious confidence issue.

I’ve come to see these moments as life lessons. You have to be honest and explain that life isn’t always fair and that, no matter how hard you try, you don’t always win. Being a good sport when you win is easy. Being a good sport when you lose is tough. Sitting down with kids to talk these things through really is essential.

Competing again and again when you haven’t won takes a lot of strength, commitment and personal courage. No one might know your name and you may never be a Maradona, but for those with the relsilience to try, fail and try again, sport is pretty good preparation for the bigger game of life with all its twists and turns, and ups and downs.

Maybe that’s another and more important form of winning.