“Canberra Matters” columnist PAUL COSTIGAN shares some April 1 news from Tramalot Castle on London Circuit. 

THE Minister for Canberra Planning has today (April 1) revealed that, no really, he’s actually read the hundreds of submissions that hard-working Canberra residents have submitted around the so-called planning reforms.

He says that he regrets that, in the past, the government failed to acknowledge that residents had important points to make on planning and development, and that these views have been ignored in favour of the requests from developers.

In pursuit of the full picture, the minister says he sat in his favourite vintage car (his home office) and read all the submissions from community councils and individual residents.

He was impressed by the quality and quantity of the submissions, but puzzled about how the community groups find time to be so efficiently responding to the never-ending calls for feedback on planning issues.

He concedes there are huge problems with the proposed new territory plan and the district strategies, and that everything is more complex and harder to comprehend than the previous planning documentation. 

Likewise, he’s not sure he even understands most of what is being proposed and has asked for someone to explain just how he’s got it so wrong. 

It now seems to the minister that there’s little in what is being proposed that addresses the key issues raised by residents – biodiversity, climate readiness, energy efficient houses, innovative architecture, more green spaces, and ensuring that neighbourhoods are respected when developments are proposed.

To a question about how he thought the chief minister may react to this change of heart, the minister admitted to embarrassment. 

He says that over the last year he’s been preoccupied with the future… of his extensive collection of vintage cars. 

But things have got to change and, despite any objections from the chief, the minister has promised to assert his independent authority over planning and will drive over to the planning office on Northbourne Avenue to ask, politely, that the proposed reforms be trashed and for someone to come up with real 21st century planning for the Bush Capital. 

Meanwhile, the city’s community groups have welcomed any announced change of heart from the Minister for Canberra Planning. They say that everyone should now be able to look forward to some real engagements on what great things could be happening in the way of new developments, affordable housing, social housing and the increasing of the biodiversity and green infrastructure of the city.

But it’s April 1 and maybe someone’s taking the mick, though surely, as minister for planning, he’d always place a top priority on taking residents seriously. Reality check: someone will get back to us on that…