Canberra is blessed with amazing clouds and sunsets, but few of those hurrying Brack-like* to and from work seem to appreciate their transient beauty, says columnist CLIVE WILLIAMS.

I WORKED for a few years in deserts where clouds were nowhere to be seen and I missed them sorely – along with rain. 

However, in 2018 I was fortunate to be in the Sahara in Morocco with the Tuareg people when storm clouds broke bringing flooding rains. Many of their sub-teen children had never seen rain. 

I had earlier naively asked why Tuareg wore dark clothing given that it absorbed the sun’s heat – the simple reason is they don’t have enough water for washing clothes and dark colours don’t show the dirt!

Anyway, back to Canberra clouds. We all know that clouds are visible masses of minute liquid droplets, frozen crystals or other particles suspended in the atmosphere. The main cloud types are stratus, cirrus, stratocumulus, cumulus, and cumulonimbus. 

Stratus clouds are the low-level clouds characterised by horizontal layering. Cirrus clouds are high-level clouds characterised by thin, wispy strands, taking their name from the Latin word cirrus, meaning a ringlet or curling lock of hair. Stratocumulus clouds are in layers characterised by large, rounded cloud masses. Cumulus white clouds are “puffy”, “cotton-like” or “fluffy” in appearance. Cumulonimbus clouds are dense, towering dark rain clouds (from Latin nimbus meaning “rainy cloud”) formed by powerful upward air currents.

One of the most damaging and costly products of cumulonimbus clouds can be hailstones. The ones that damaged cars in the inner south in January, 2020 – and wrote off our Subaru and skylight – were often golfball size. The damage bill from that one storm system alone – which went through regional Victoria, and then on to the ACT and parts of Sydney – has been estimated at more than $1.65 billion.

Other cloud-related damage can be caused by lightning. There are three main types of lightning: inside a single thundercloud; between two different clouds, and; between a cloud and the ground. There are five to 10 deaths from lightning strikes in Australia each year and more than 100 injuries.

To make cloud matters more complicated we now store data in the cloud (I understand that Moses was the first person in history to download data from the cloud to a tablet).

As you might expect, I have many cloud-related anecdotes, but I only have space here for two:

An Irishman is struggling to find a parking space. “Lord”, he prays, “open a parking space for me and I swear I’ll give up the drink and go to mass every Sunday.” The clouds part and the sun shines on an empty space in the car park. Without hesitation, Paddy says, “Never mind, Lord, I’ve managed to find one.” 

A Soviet couple were walking down the street when they saw an ominous dark cumulonimbus cloud. 

The husband says: “I think it’s going to rain.” 

The wife says: “No, I think it’s going to snow.” 

To resolve the matter, the husband asks the local commissar who just happens to be passing.

“Comrade Rudolf, will it rain or snow?” 

The commissar replies: “It will definitely rain.” 

When the husband tells the wife, she asks wonderingly: “How can he be so sure?” 

The husband explains: “Rudolf the red knows rain, dear.”

Boom, boom.

Clive Williams is a Canberra columnist

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